WARNING:
This page is meant only for parents who are desperate to regain their child’s love and trust. The measures listed below could probably create opportunities to strengthen the bonding. You might already know or have even tried a couple of them. But please remember — they are all purely temporary and short-lived. If you wish your child to TRUST YOU, you have to become his BEST FRIEND.
Now for the “shortcuts”.
- Go easy on his diet for a couple of meals. Some say: “The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.” Well, the same route works fine for children, too!
- Play the indoor game that he enjoys immensely ( and you always disliked it…) Or just play the ‘Know-your-home’ game. It goes like this: Blindfold your child and ask him to walk to the bathroom to get his toothbrush. Of course, you need to give him alerts, so that he doesn’t trip and fall to hurt himself. Next should be your turn to pick up the item that he demands. Fun and laughter are guaranteed!
- Offer to invite his friends for an outing to the place of their choice — park, beach, restaurant or simply a get-together in one of the friends’ house. Well, go ahead; join them in their merry-making by sharing the snacks and playing team games.
- When your child is within your earshot, pretend that you didn’t know it and make an imaginary phone call to someone unknown to him. Talk casually and slowly get into suggestions on happy parenting. You will quote all the positive traits in your child and continue to tell the nice things that he had been doing on and off. Wind up wishing that all children could be like your own child. Leave the conversation at that and DO NOT LOOK FOR THE CHILD’S REACTION. Let him think that you actually didn’t know that he heard it all.
- When your child is eagerly sharing an interesting event with you, kneel down, bring your eyes in line with his, place your hands on his shoulders and simply enjoy listening to him. The perfect way to show him that you adore him. Your body language will do the talking and draw him towards you.
- Indulge in silly pranks along with him– You could imitate a dinosaur making a sandwich, fill the room with soap bubbles, have a race jumping backwards, race him in counting the number of men wearing glasses in ten minutes’ time at the park… Simply freak out with him.
- And before he is fast asleep, sit by his bedside and engage in a brief but loud talk to God (if your are a believer, that is), thanking Him for the best gift received — your child, of course. (You ought to be doing this genuinely!) Kiss him gently and walk away.
I recommend that you take one or more of these shortcuts as would suit you and your child. The great Indian ascetic, Swami Ramakrishna found it agreeable that mankind should at least pretend to be good, because he believed that the pretending itself would become a habit, eventually. So it is all right that you are making efforts artificially– taking ideas from a book or from a website: Your mission is noble and you have every right and privilege to it.
Get going! And very soon, simply bask in your child’s unparalled love and unshakable trust.